Since her breakup with ex-fiancé Joel Schiffman in January 2022, Hoda Kotb has been open about navigating the world of dating once again.
The TV personality, who had been in a long-term relationship with Schiffman, has shared her thoughts and insights on what she values most in a future partner.
Recently, Kotb revealed a key detail that she considers a “dating dealbreaker” when it comes to relationships,
shedding light on the qualities she finds most important in a potential partner.
The revelation came during the October 28 episode of The TODAY Show,
when Kotb and guest co-host Laura Jarrett discussed a viral moment involving Spider-Man star Tom Holland.
Holland was seen protecting his girlfriend, Zendaya, from the paparazzi, stepping between her and photographers as they got too close. The heartwarming act of chivalry sparked a conversation about respect and the qualities that define a strong relationship.
Kotb shared her own experience, explaining how her childhood shaped her view on how men should behave in a relationship. “Ever since I was a kid — and this kind of shaped how I view men — my dad was always uber polite,” she recalled. “Like, to a point where my mother never — I didn’t know she could touch a door handle. I never saw her do it. He did it every time. Not because she couldn’t, but because he was saying, ‘After you.’” Kotb’s story about her father’s constant politeness toward her mother painted a picture of respect and consideration that left a lasting impact on her.
“I think there’s something about somebody who sees you and just is polite,” she continued. “You just want someone who sees you. I think that’s one of my absolutes. Without that, then it’s like, it’s not happening.” For Kotb, the importance of being seen and treated with respect is non-negotiable in a relationship, making it a core value she seeks in any future partner. This emphasis on politeness and thoughtfulness reflects her desire for a connection built on mutual respect and appreciation.
Kotb’s candid revelation about what she looks for in a partner resonated deeply with her fans, who took to social media to express their support and share similar experiences. One commenter wrote, “My dad was like this too … a gentleman 🙂,” while another shared, “That’s how my husband is with me. It was a learning curve for me but now I love it! He cherishes me and shows me constantly.” Many fans expressed admiration for Kotb’s straightforwardness and shared stories about their own relationships built on respect and politeness.
This is not the first time Kotb has opened up about her dating journey since parting ways with Schiffman. In August 2024, during an appearance on the Jamie Kern Lima Show, Kotb candidly spoke about the reasons behind her breakup with Schiffman. “Joel is one of the best people I know,” Kotb said at the time. “He really is a great human being, and I feel like I’m a great human being. But sometimes two great human beings together isn’t enough to make it work.” She explained that their differing personal growth trajectories made it challenging to stay in sync as a couple. “I think when people are growing at different paces, it’s hard to be in sync,” Kotb reflected. “And I think a lot of people are probably in these situations. I get it.”
Despite the split, Kotb has remained positive and hopeful about her future. She continues to prioritize her family, especially her two daughters, Haley and Hope, while also venturing into new professional opportunities. Kotb’s openness about her personal life and the lessons she has learned along the way serves as a reminder that relationships are complex, and finding someone who aligns with your values is essential.
Kotb’s insights into her dating dealbreaker highlight the importance of mutual respect, consideration, and kindness in any relationship. For her, finding someone who understands these values is crucial, and she has made it clear that without these qualities, a romantic connection just isn’t possible. As she continues to explore the dating world, Kotb’s fans are cheering her on and offering support as she navigates this next chapter in her life.
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